But nothing makes me quite as happy as all the ridiculous things that WordPress tells me about my blog.
My favorite search terms people have used to find my blog:
Sorry guys, but clearly I win the Internet.
I am 100% sure my blog is NOT what they were looking for.
- what happened to regretsy
Now you know. You’re welcome. - themes for 14 graduates
I…don’t think I have ever truly addressed this concern. - things to make out of pop cans
Oh oh oh! I can help with this! Pinterest is here for you! - eat concern
I can play this game too. “Sleep anger.” “Drink apathy.” - safe hobbies
This is not the right blog for you. I am sorry Google betrayed you. - a meeting should never be longer than
Ok. This one I totally covered. - how to kill spider eggs on christmas tree
If I knew that, my parents would still be getting live Christmas trees. Sorry to clearly lie to you, Internet. - gattafish username online dating sites
Hey! Someone found me trying to stalk their date! Way to use the Internet! - badly written letterto santa
Yep. Got this covered in every way. - dating in your 20s
It’s awful, right? - girl gushers
NOPE. This is clearly not the blog you were looking for. - sweet on zoosk
Am not. You take that back. - white blonde hair
Finally. My alabaster hair is good for something. - dmv social experiment
Ok, to be fair, I Googled this too after I saw this. Because I want to know if it’s all just an experiment, too. - spider eggs on a christmas tree
I have cornered this topic on the Internet! WOO!
Countries I have collected:
FRANCE
Man I love Canada so much.
THE UK! (Guys. GUYS! It could be THE QUEEN.)
Seriously. I may not have mentioned how much I love Canada.
VIETNAM
Awww. Why no love Canada?
AUSTRALIA
Oh hi Canada!
RUSSIA
It’s so big I almost forget how much I miss Canada.
BAHRAIN (totally a real place!)
Knowing that Canada had already shown me love, I was free to Google where, exactly, Bahrain is. It’s in this circle. Somewhere.
FINLAND (Also a real place, for those of you who studied geography in the US!)
Guys! Finland and Canada TOGETHER! ❤
OMG I LOVE CANADA
Oh. Hey Canada. I didn’t even know you’d be here.
Oh, right, and the place where I live:
And Canada! ❤
U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
So these are the reasons* that I love my blog. Don’t you feel like you just got backstage passes or something? You are welcome.
*Canada
(Thank you guys for reading my blog. It blows my mind that anyone would bother to check it out, especially people in other countries, and people who don’t know me**. Most of all, I do want to thank the people who know me and read this, because, well, you already have me inflicted on you.)
**Aren’t literally bombarded with my pleas to read this.
Perpetual Plot Hole 
Well, I don’t have to tell you this over and over again, but I’m obsessed! When I read your blog, I smile, and I love it *okay, maybe the bug post was an exception because I was cringing all the way through… but… I MADE IT! haha!* I also love seeing countries were my blog ‘have been to’. I’ve officially covered all the continents for the exception of Antarctica… hmm.. I wonder why…. 😀 Have a wonderful day! I’m looking forward to your next post! xoxo
where* (hate stupid typos)
PS. it’s insane the diversity of the search items that you get!!!!
It tells you how much I enjoy reading your comments that I didn’t even notice the typo until you pointed it out! (And I do words for a living. Seriously. People pay me for it. Weird, right?) Thank you for the praise – it’s especially awesome since I’m a HUGE fan of your blog! I’ve been checking all the continents off my list – it took AGES to get South America…And then I forgot to take a screen grab of the map! I’m still short on Africa though…you’re ahead of me 🙂
…Man, we are just going to have to ship someone down to Antarctica with a good 4G connection so we can all finally corner that end of the map…Any volunteers?
SERIOUSLY! That empty continent is really bothering me…. It’s like… it’s like… A SORE in my eye! Ouchhh! It hurtsssss! :)))))))))) xoxoxo
PS. South Africa… I have only Brazil so far. But I’m in a total of 36 countries right now (I wish I travelled there too though!!! and not only my blog… bummer!). Anyone generous enough to take me on the world tour? *don’t they say you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take?!?!?! loooool*
I’m betting we can get Antarctica. There are scientists there. I wonder how many degrees of separation we are…
New goal: Get this blog to Antarctica.
And this is why I ❤ you. I support this quest. Time to befriend strangers-who-are-scientists!
Seriously. My aunt went to Antarctica (ha. See how that's an adorable pun? Oh the world just sets me up for these things) years and years ago when I was a child. If only I'd bothered to foster this blog back then…
How long has Brazil been in Africa?
Ever since I put it there.
It happened shortly after I attended geography class and decided everything outside of North America is probably on one super-continent where water goes backwards down the drain and Christmas is in summer.
Is that not how geography works?
Ha! I love reading the search engine terms. Seriously, I can’t even tell what people were hoping to find when they push that search button, but I’m sure my blog was not it.
Now, I have to know about these spider eggs on Christmas trees…
By the way, this is one of the funniest blogs I’ve stumbled upon in a long time. I love it!
Thank you SO much! That makes my day to hear 🙂 I have a blast writing this, and it just makes me so happy that ANYONE reads it.
Spider eggs in Christmas trees are the bane of my existence. They are the most evil present of all time. Honestly, coal is better.
the UK…it could be the Queen…
It could be me 😀
or my friend Rachel with whom I shared your blog…because it is awesome!
Heeheehee – well thank you for representing the UK. I nominate you high ruler of the whole place now. Especially since you shared!
Woohoo!
I am in charge…I may make a new law regarding headphones in the workplace…
Good law. As a minion in a foreign land, I second this law-motion.
awesome…I believe a second from a minion in a foreign land is all it takes to pass a law 🙂
it shall be so!