Or: How Adding Feet to Something Makes it EVEN MORE AMAZING
*Let’s just agree that this is what the Super Bowl should be called. Actual bowls are not involved. More chicken wings are involved than bowls. Bowl-shaped stadiums are not worthy of event names.
OK, Internet. I have a confession to make. It may be hard for you to hear (or read)…but I just have to get it off my chest. Here we go.
I am not good at sports things.
I do not understand soccer. I do not understand tennis, Rugby is a mystery, and I think cricket is an insect. I barely understand hockey and baseball. I threw an entire party last year based around two concepts: I don’t understand football** and I wanted to impress a guy I liked***.
**What do you mean that yellow line isn’t real? It appears on my screen during EVERY GAME. My TV wouldn’t lie to me!
***This has worked out very well for me. I highly recommend this tactic. Mostly because I still TOTALLY like this guy, and he likes me back. I’ll tell you all about it later.
I know that in this modern era, this is a shameful thing to admit. But I’m being brave for you, Internet. Because something really important happened while I was watching sports.*****
*****Which I was totally doing again this year to impress the same guy.
Guys. I watched someone win a design argument ON LIVE TV. And if you watched Sunday SportsBall, you did too. Let me explain:
Things don’t just pop into being in the world of entertainment. The things we see every day are the result of someone else’s brain-magic pumping out ideas and putting them down on paper.
Someone legitimately sat down, considered what would be the best possible background for Katy Perry singing “California Girls” would be, and determined that singing beachballs and lip-syncing sharks with legs was the way to go. They not only had to sketch this idea out on paper, but more horrifyingly, they then undoubtedly had to present it to their peers and supervisors.
Presenting creative concepts to a gathering of peers and supervisors is rough. And this person was presenting the concept of sharks with legs.******
******Coincidentally, this is how the apocalypse will actually happen. Forget about zombies. We’re seeing the future dance before us.
But the key to getting the creative ideas you believe in turned into reality is having a solid argument ready.
A good argument is really the only way to get your way. We all learned this as children.
This argument surely happened long before Sunday SportsBall actually took place. That means the poor inventor of these sharkian masterpieces was forced to suffer the silent ridicule and judgement of his or her peers every day until the mystical Half-Time show.
That’s when the magic went live:
And then the Internet responded.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you win an argument AND get to design shark costumes with feet.
NOTE: This story is not even slightly based in fact. It’s just the only explanation I can come up with for how lip-syncing plush sharks with feet made it onto one of the most-watched television events in America.
In case you somehow missed it, or do not live in America, I’d like to introduce you to the stars of the Super Bowl:
I think I would understand sports so much more if there were more sharks involved.